Let’s be honest with each other from the start, we all know that no one gets excited from failures; however, we have to learn to deal with them. As the old saying goes, “we learn from our mistakes.” The biggest hurdle with failure is learning to bounce back.
Whether it’s from being depressed, stressed, sick, or just having a bad week, it happens to all of us. If you are trying to bounce back or reset after getting out of routine, I am totally with you.
One week I will be super great and hit all my goals and the next week, it’s like everything falls apart. It’s really easy to start out motivated and pile a whole lot on your plate and sometimes we need to ask ourselves if we are piling on too much. It might be that we are just checking all these boxes and feel great, but if it’s not sustainable than you feel crummy about it. We have all been there at some point, making a bad decision or giving up on a goal.
When I do get off my diet or exercise routine, it’s difficult to get back to get back into the swing of it. The self talk the idea “I ruined it” or “I haven’t reached my goal” and it could be crippling. It’s very easy to just throw in the towel, but we need to retrain our brain to see self care as an ongoing thing.
Let’s use the example of new years resolutions. According to Forbes, The statistics on how many people actually follow through and accomplish their New Year’s resolutions are rather grim. Studies have shown that less than 25% of people actually stay committed to their resolutions after just 30 days, and only 8% accomplish them. We put this pressure on ourselves with high expectations that if I don’t do it perfectly than I have failed and have to start all over again. You can’t motivate someone else by degrading them, but why do we do it to ourselves all the time?
Are you the type of person who drives around on E as long as you can without running out of gas? I am guilty of this and like many, I do the same with my body. I keep going and going until reaching the breaking point when I crash. That needs to change. And when we do run out of “gas”- we can’t keep beating ourselves up.
For example, I try to walk every morning before going to work, so I have to wake up at 4:40 in order to meet the walking crew. There are days when I don’t feel like going and decide to sleep in a little. I usually spend the entire morning beating myself up for not going for a walk and it gets worse if I continue to step out of my daily routine. At this point, I continue to beat myself up over not walking and make myself feel worse. This needs to stop! Life isn’t over because I missed a few days of walking, I just need to pick myself up and start the routine back up. That means means that we need to change our thinking– if we get out of a routine, it doesn’t mean that you are doomed. Self sabotage and how we speak to yourself when it does happen. You have to approach everything you do with self compassion. You are the only person that will give yourself the 24 hours support! Read that again, you are the ONLY person who will give yourself 24 hours of support! Be kind to yourself (as I tell my kids). There are enough people trying to beat us down, why are we beating ourselves?
5 Ideas to Avoid that feeling of breaking the routine
- Practicing grace with yourself is huge- Allow yourself the grace to be too tired or to feel overwhelmed to skip a workout or to eat a donut to feel better. Stop beating yourself up and give yourself some room for failure. You work hard and deserve forgiveness for getting out of the routine. Stop beating yourself up about it (did I say that already?)!!
- Say No to things that you don’t want to do, so you don’t feel like you have disappointed someone. If not a YES right away, then consider it a no.
- Set Boundaries – Stop trying to over schedule yourself! Part of the reason that that we have failed or disappointed someone is because we try to do too much. Schedule things in advance to set boundaries this way you will see that maybe there is a day that is just too jam packed that you can’t fit in exercise.
- Adjust on the fly – Don’t take one If you miss your workout in the morning, see where you can fit it in throughout the day. If you eat a few cookies, don’t dive into the Oreo package- but instead see what you can eat that won’t make you feel bad later. Ask yourself, “how will I feel about this choice tomorrow?”
- Remember that tomorrow is a new day! Start fresh!
I would love to know how you BOUNCING BACK Without Beating Yourself Back Down. Share with us on Facebook or in the comment section. If you are looking for more ideas to try and relax, we have some great resources for practicing self care